To say the least, I was shattered when my wife announced that she wanted to end our 20 year marriage. It took a considerable toll on my well-being – I shed considerable weight from the stress, and I reached a point where I was emotionally and mentally in a very fragile state.
I thought we had it all; two beautiful teenage daughters, both doing exceptionally well at school; excellent health; a nice home; annual holidays; a good household income; and all the things this modern world defines as being ‘happy’. But clearly my ex-wife was not happy. And having gone through a process of rediscovering myself, I can say I wasn’t happy either.
Getting through that time was a very very painful process. I felt all the emotions – shock, disbelief, panic, frustration, confusion, anxiety, anger, guilt, depression, loss of hope. I felt them all. The future looked dark and overwhelming. I so desperately wanted to win her heart back and make things right.
Well, it took some doing, but Carol helped me realise that I needed to get my self right, in order for anything else to happen. Huh? What the hell does that mean I remember asking myself.
Carol gently helped me to understand how important it is to look after my self. I was dogged, but she kept politely ignoring my pleas for ‘strategies’ to win back my ex-wife’s heart. As time went on, Carol got to know me and her strategies were about me looking after me. I got to know Carol too, and with some reluctance J, I trusted her more and more. From a state of total loss of hope, I started to feel that there was something unique in what Carol was offering me. Often, getting in the mindset for change is the hardest thing.
So I decided look after my self. I de-cluttered my life, and I started to focus on my personal self-intimacy; getting comfortable in my own skin and discovering who I am at the essence. Forever obsessed about the future, Carol showed me how to let go. How this day is the most important, right now. To live every moment in life.
Consequently, I can genuinely say I am happy, by far the happiest I’ve ever been. I am totally focused on the here and now and I feel ALIVE, every moment of every day. Sure, I still plan for the future but I don’t let it stress me. There’s no point. I know that by living life to the fullest in the here and now, that the future will be fine. It’s a conundrum that was difficult to really understand, but it’s true.
Thank you so much Carol. Thank you for helping me be me.